One of the few guarantees we have in life is that things will change. The Coronavirus has recently reinforced and amplified this principle, and how we operate and behave is anything but business as usual. I’ve come to think of it as “business as unusual”, or I’ve heard it called the “new normal”. Any way you look at it, change requires us to think more and act differently. As with everything else, the etiquette of how we must interact with one another has evolved and changed to reflect our new reality.
Social distancing – not touching one another or things with our bare hands and walking around masked while in public places feels odd. There’s nothing as disarming as greeting someone with a warm smile. However, wearing a mask dramatically changes this. Nor is a routine handshake acceptable. Forget about a hug. I’m hopeful that one day soon we will be able to resume those activities, but for the time being it’s not permissible or fair to either party. Some people have embraced these changes and others have not. I’m not even going to guess why someone has not because it’s an exercise in futility and unfair to judge. After 20 years of experience with employee relations I know that change is hard.
Recently, I ventured out to my favorite supermarket (I was masked and wearing gloves). I waited in a line for 15 minutes outside the store and stayed six feet away from the next person. Everyone seemed to be patient, following the distancing rule. Once I entered, I felt like a ninja warrior trying to always stay 6 feet away from the next person. In some cases, this required waiting patiently while someone picked out a certain item. While looking for a specific item on the shelf a person came very close to me and asked if he could reach over me for something. In response, I swiftly, firmly, and clearly said, “No!”. That stopped him immediately and he took a few steps back. I replied, “I didn’t mean to startle you. My apologies if you think I ‘m being unreasonable, but I’m trying to follow the distancing guidelines. If you are in a hurry please allow me to move out of your way and I will return later.” He simply said, “Sorry” and briskly walked away. Again, change is hard and we never really know what’s going on with another person. However, etiquette does not say we should be taken advantage of, rather that we communicate and act with grace.
Following are some social distancing etiquette suggestions that might make navigating this unusual time period feel a little smoother, and more comfortable.
- First and foremost, it is not rude to politely insist that someone stay six feet away from you.
- Try to be the person to move first or make your way across the street depending on the situation. Because we are wearing masks, remember to use your words where in the past you may have just smiled. For instance, if someone is nervous or anxious that what they are doing is causing you to wait, you can say, “Please, take your time. I’m in no hurry and just want to give you space.”
- Be prepared with a statement in your head if someone encroaches on your space. Preparation allows you to communicate calmly and with grace. Here are a couple examples:
- My apologies if you think I ‘m being difficult, but I’m trying to follow social distancing guidelines.
- I hope you understand, but I must insist that you please move at least six feet away from me. Thank you.
- Handshakes are no longer recommended; instead you could wave, nod, “elbow bump”, or possibly offer a hands together namaste greeting. If someone extends their arm for a handshake you can politely state that you are not comfortable shaking hands due to the recommended CDC guidelines, but do appreciate the gesture and suggest an elbow bump.
Being straightforward in your communication is necessary when basic safety could be jeopardized; however, it’s also not a free license to communicate in a way that’s impolite. Try to be prepared with verbal and actionable responses. Of course, stay at home whenever possible (for now), but if you must go out, I hope these suggestions will make life a little easier. These are challenging times and our new business as unusual will require modifications to how we interact and communicate with each other.